Sorry, I do believe that title could be a "before and after" clue on Wheel of Fortune.
But anyway, not too long ago I posted about my sweet friend that is about to become a first time mommy. I seem to recall asking all you lazy moms out there to go leave her your best new mom advice on her really fun blog, which I'm pretty sure none of you did.
Well, don't worry. You now have another chance to redeem yourselves in my eyes.
Here, live and in person (well, she's not actually LIVE, but she's in person) Abigail is guest posting for me while I'm gone away with The Lazy Dad for our 10 year Anniversary (which is today). Since he and I are busy gazing into each others eyes, you should sit back and enjoy your time with her - the only person in the world who likes using parenthesis more than I do. (And leave her some new mom advice at the end of this post!)
Heeeeeeeeeeere's ABI! (Although she doesn't really go by that name)....
In one week medical science says that the baby in my tummy is "due". We'll see about that! I, for one would be perfectly happy if that baby decided to make his appearance early. Actually, if I was going to be perfectly honest, then I'd have to admit that what I'd really like is for the baby and I to sit down with my calendar (I don't think he has one yet) and decide on a really convenient time and place for me to go into labor. For instance, I don't have anything scheduled for next Tuesday just yet. How about Tuesday at, saaaay, 8 am after a good nights sleep and maybe a little breakfast? Doesn't that sound like a good plan? Looking forward to it! Can't wait to get together!
Ahhhh! If only, right?! Sadly my uptight, over-planning nature will probably have to be the first thing to go once I have a child. I know I will have to learn a lot before I can pin on my Lazy Mom badge, but in preparation I've done one thing to train...I've become a Lazy Housewife.
When I first got married I was not a Lazy Housewife. During my first year of marriage I threw several parties. When these events were planned I would put it on the calendar and block off a huge chunk of time for "preparation".
Preparation included cleaning the house from top to bottom, (because you NEVER KNOW, your guest might get turned around in your giant 2 bedroom apartment and end up in your hall closet...and if that were to happen, they would need to see that your towels were color coordinated.) followed by an intense menu planning (cornish game hen, anyone?!), followed by a long trip to the grocery store (or two...because that first store doesn't HAVE the special cheese that you want to garnish the top of your salads), followed by an afternoon/evening of cooking....and then the decorating (no table is complete without a flower arrangement). The table MUST be set before the guests arrive (!!) and the food must be in that mythical state of "perfectly ready" so that its not cold when its put on the table, and yet HEAVEN FORBID your guests have to wait for something to come out of the oven....
So you can imagine that entertaining in our house was a BIG OL' DEAL and while I enjoyed it, I obviously didn't have the luxury to do it all the time, because lets be honest not many people have whole DAYS set aside for party planning purposes. Which is how I slowly but surely converted to being a Lazy Housewife.
Lazy Housewifery looks like this...
On Friday I was throwing a 30th Birthday party for a friend at my house. Around 10am that morning I got a phone call inviting me to a craft lunch (score! free lunch AND learn how to make cute earrings?!? I'm there!)...and no worries I would STILL be able to plan the party afterwards....
At around 11am I got a call from a friend who recently had a baby, "Could she come over and visit for a little while in the afternoon? She was getting stir crazy at home." Perfect! I'd just be finishing up my earrings and then I could run home to let in my visitors (I went ahead and invited another new mom over for good measure) and then I'd still have several hours before the party....plenty of time to get ready!
And that's how slowly, any "fancy" plans I had, instead became me starting a grocery list for the party at around 4:30pm (party starts at 7pm), throwing together a cake mix (because for the life of me they taste better than homemade) at 5pm, putting it out to cool while I headed to the store to pick up some paper plates (because I'm not doing the dishes!) and some chips (because I'm not making any "before dinner cocktails") and sending my husband to pick up pizzas (because I'm not standing over a hot stove!)
The point of this story is that I have learned that if PEOPLE are the priority of entertaining (which I kinda think they are), than its SO MUCH better to throw down the paper plates rather than get out the fancy china and use that extra dishwashing energy to spend some time with some new moms or a lonely neighbor.
I'm thinking motherhood is going to be similar....So, before I go making equally over-the-top Mom Mistakes as I strive to "get it right", feel free to drop off your infant equivalent to getting out the paper plates so that I can focus on the REAL priority...raising a happy, healthy, responsible kid. (This means leave me some good Lazy Mom Baby Tips, people!!)
And I think you ALL should go do that right this very little minute! Find the comments link below and leave this sweet lazy-mom-in-waiting your best new mom advice and tips!
Who knows... maybe the best advice left will win a prize?!?!?!