So I have no idea if you'ns really liked my Twitter recap post last week. I mean, there were a couple of you that left a comment and said you did. But even if you didn't, I've decided that in the best interest of laziness I'm doing another Twitter recap post for you today.
Aren't I all considerate and stuff?
And yes, it's in the best interest of laziness because it means I don't have to come up with anything original to post today. I'm a very pathetic Lazy Mom.
So last Monday we celebrated my daughter's 6th birthday. Which was a difficult day for me. Mainly because of this.
Oh, and also on Monday This Tweet shows you just how dedicated I am to our church that I would sacrifice my car for the church pot luck.
And yes I'm going to tell it to you.
Because you see, the crock pot spillage was actually all The Lazy Dad's fault. Because since he's the Pastor of the church he has to get there early and all. And since he gets there early and all, I was in a mass frenzy to get three kids out the door to church all by myself because I am, after all, a single mother on Sundays.
And in my mass frenzy to get three kids out the door he texts me and I basically just glanced at it because I'm in said mass frenzy and so I glance at it quickly and it said, "Get pot luck stuff." And seeing that I had totally forgotten about bringing something to potluck I tromp down to the basement in a bigger mass frenzy to fetch the crock pot and I grab a four pack of canned green beans on the shelf above it and quickly dump them all into the crock pot before mass frenzily heading out of the house for church.
And now, since I'm in the car on the way to church I take the time at a stop sign to look at the text message again and instead of it saying, "Get pot luck stuff," it says, "Got pot luck stuff." You're kidding me right? Wrong. I'm not kidding you. The Lazy Dad has already gotten something for pot luck! And so naturally on the first corner we take the crock pot spills all over the floor with green beans and green bean juice going everywhere. And so I walk into church totally embarrassed that I'm showing up to pot luck Sunday with a crock pot only a quarter of the way full of green beans. As the Pastor's wife.
See? It's all The Lazy Dad's fault.
I knew you'd see that if I explained it to you.
So after eating at pot luck Sunday and having a birthday complete with two birthday cakes and after doing this all day Tuesday pretty much, I decided to announce that I was going on a diet.
So not only did I start a diet, I also started walking. Which led to this Tweet. Which led to this Tweet.
Aren't you so glad you're reading this?
Also last week I found THIS out! I could hardly believe it! A national holiday in honor of lazy moms! It was a glorious day. Oh, and Joe Biden must have learned about it because when The Lazy Dad did this to me, this happened. And I'm pretty sure I heard him say to my kids, "Tell your mom Happy Lazy Moms Day" or something like that.
Oh! And a strange phenomenon kept happening last week which I was wondering if it had ever happened to you before? This and this. And because of this really strange phenomenon I sadly announced this.
It's a pathetic life I lead.
And thankfully for you, this post is over because I believe that's my week in a nut shell. Or should I say a Twitter shell?
Let's just pretend I didn't make such a corny joke, shall we?
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