1. I confess that sometimes I can be a bit naughty.
Last week I went to our annual pastor’s wife retreat. Remember last years recap of 10 things you shouldn’t do at a pastor’s wife retreat? Well, let’s just say that this year I actually did number 4. Except none of the women in the other rooms would fall asleep! So instead of waiting them out so we could toilet paper their rooms, my friend Kathy and I decided to toilet paper our roommates cars instead.
We laughed and giggled and laughed some more as we TP’d those cars and our roommates didn’t suspect a thing! In the morning light they looked beautimous.
Except Jenilee didn’t think so. She maybe-kinda-sorta wanted to hurt me.
So I stood there and laughed and took pictures of her as she cleaned up her car… never once commanding me to help her.
Just wait till you hear Jenilee’s side of the story. There’s so much more to the story that I’m not even sharing with you. Including that the other roommate’s car we toilet papered was a rental.
2. I confess that I have blond moments.
Before pastor’s wife retreat began Jenilee, Heather and I met in Delaware Ohio and did some light shopping. As I went to check out I ran my debit card through the machine and punched in my pin number, but it was declined.
Confused, I ran it through again, punched in my pin number and it was declined again.
At this point I start to think that maybe Lazy Dad has changed the pin number on me?
I run the card through yet again, punch in a different pin number and again, it’s declined.
Now, I’m certain of it! Lazy Dad has changed the pin number on me! I’m starting to get irritated. I can’t believe he has done this to me! How dare he!!
Then I look in my wallet and realize I had been using the wrong credit card.
3. I confess that I can rock some awesome bed head in the morning.
Case in point:
I rest my case.
4. I confess that I still wear panty hose on occasion.
I know, I know. Many of you have abandoned panty hose to the great abyss, but listen people. I need the color on my legs and the control top on my tummy (okay, and bum) or I would abandon them myself.
Plus, it’s a good cardio workout wrestling them on. And uh, that may be the only cardio I do. So see? I can’t abandon them!
5. I confess I’m gorgeous.
(Please see confession number 3 to confirm this.)
This weekend I got hit on by a grocery cart pusher. When I realized he was hitting on me two things popped in my head….
Number 1: I still got it.
Number 2: I wonder if grocery cart pusher’s wife is a step up from pastor’s wife?
After I was conflicted over my second thought for a second, I decided that pastor or not, Lazy Dad was too cute and good to me to leave for the life of a grocery cart pusher’s wife. So I flashed my ring around and he finally left me to load my car for myself again.
Sorry grocery cart pusher. If I wouldn’t leave Lazy Dad for Nigel Barker, then you didn’t really stand a chance, now did you?
That’s what I’m confessing… what do you want to confess?
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