I like a neat house.
It doesn’t necessarily have to be scrubbed clean and shining like the Chrysler Building (by the way, does that building even shine?) I just like everything in its place. Okay?
Then I had children. Three to be exact. And apparently when children are born into this world they have no sense of things in its place. Like I do.
For the first 5 years of being a mom this drove. me. mad. I’m not OCD or anything, but come on! Put stuff away already!
I had no idea how grumpy I could get over a cluttered, messed up house until my Little Darlings showed me what was really inside me. Which is, by the way, the whole reason I think God blesses us with children (and husbands)… to show us what’s really inside our hearts. Oh the nastiness of my heart never ceases to amaze me. If I didn’t have children or a husband, I would still be walking around this fallen world thinking I was made of genuine gold on the inside! But that’s another story for another post…
Where was I?… Grumpiness. That’s right.
So up until a year ago maybe, I would be so grumpy over my disorderly house that by the time my husband came home from work, I would be a wretched mess. Nothing pretty to come home to, if you ask me. Would YOU want to come home to a grumpy old wife everyday after work? I wouldn’t! So I decided I had to learn to let some things go.
Now moms that are old pro’s will tell you this a lot when you’re a new mom. “Just learn to let some things go….” I knew what they were saying was true, but putting it in to action wasn’t so easy! How do you let go of something that drives you mad? That’s the problem with those old pro’s. They never tell you HOW to do the things they recommend, they just tell you WHAT you should be doing!
I decided to ask my husband a question (this was well over a year ago, so there is no way he’ll remember the conversation we had). I asked him if it bothered him when he came home to a messy house? I thought there might be a chance that he’d say yes, (I know I would say yes if someone asked me!) but to my surprise he said no! He didn’t care!
Wow. I’m on to something here. I started to become a believer in something… men would rather come home to a happy wife than an immaculate house. Let that sink in. If you really stop and think about it you’ll find some great liberation in it!
If my husband doesn’t care if the house is a mess when he gets home, then why am I killing myself over it? Why am I letting it affect me the way that it does? What’s the point?!
But wait a minute… you don’t believe me that your husband would rather come home to a happy wife than an immaculate house? Then go ask him! Ask him what’s important to him when he comes home from working all day.
Why would I do that, you ask? Doesn’t the Bible say “do to others what you would have them do to you?” Lots of times us wifey-poo’s get so caught up in the craziness of our day that we don’t stop and put ourselves into our husbands shoes. I’m guilty of it. Alot.
Wouldn’t you like it if someone asked you that question? So ask him what he’d like to come home too! If you don’t ask, then you’ll never know! Maybe you’re killing yourself doing something he doesn’t even care anything about (like I was) and you don’t even know it.
Maybe he does want to come home to a clean house, but doesn’t care about something else that you kill yourself doing everyday.
Maybe he’ll say he’d rather come home to the smell of dinner cooking on the stove (geez, who wouldn’t!).
Maybe he’ll say he’d love it if you just put some lipstick on for him!
Maybe he’d just like some nice music on or
maybe, just maybe he’ll totally suprise you and say that what’s important to him is to spend the first 10 minutes after coming home just sitting on the couch talking to you about his day!
Wow! Wouldn’t that be cool? So ladies… throw off the shackles you have put on yourself and get lazy! Ask your husband what he would like to come home to and let go of all the other stuff that isn’t necessarily important right then and be happy for them when they walk in the door!
Focus on the one thing that would make their arrival home happy and forget the rest! Come on! The key to laziness is that you are doing the MINIMUM you need to do… so get lazy! Ask your man and focus on doing that one thing and forget all the rest of the stuff that apparently doesn’t matter to him!
Leave a comment if you think you might be willing to take this challenge… and then let us know how it goes!
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